Pittsburgh Sports Report
December 2004

Been There, Wrote This
Salary Cap Or Dunce Cap
By John Mehno

If there's one thing we can all agree on, it's this:

Other people make too much money. Just pick your favorite example: Teachers. Elected officials. Port Authority drivers. Turnpike toll-takers. Professional athletes.

You can probably just jump ahead to the last entry because everyone believes athletes make too much. After all, "they play a kid's game." Actually, they're part of a multi-billion entertainment industry and are "playing a kid's game" like Bruce Springsteen is "fooling around with a guitar." But if reason entered into these debates, the Dire Straits hit "Money For Nothing" wouldn't have been so deliciously dead on.

We long ago came to the realization that sports is a fiscal never-never land where a $30 million offer can be considered insulting and the word "only" can logically proceed a figure like $500,000. It was quaint when the general manager of the Pirates made more than most of the players, but that ship sailed a long time ago.

The revolution started in 1966 when the baseball players hired Marvin Miller, a labor lawyer from the steelworkers union. Their aim was innocent enough - they wondered why they didn't get a bigger share of the profits from trading cards that bore their likenesses. By the time Miller was through de-pantsing the owners, players had free agency, a no-lose arbitration system, one of the best pension plans in the world, private rooms on the road and, oh yeah, a much bigger chunk of the money generated by baseball cards.

Other sports fell in step and kids now grow up understanding that sooner or later, their favorite team will make a decision based on dollar signs rather than talent. The money issues never really go away but they're at the forefront any time a new labor agreement is negotiated.

The National Hockey League is the latest example, but the NHL adopted the unique policy of not negotiating. Instead, this was the same scorched-earth strategy that baseball tried unsuccessfully in 1994. Essentially the plan was to blow it all up and start over, first with the demand that players protect the owners from their own excesses.

In real world terms, a salary cap defies logic. Imagine this scenario: You're a little fast and loose with the credit cards and have mounting bills. So you phone the local mall to tell them you'll be visiting this weekend but could they please restrict your spending to $500 so you can stay under your limit? Will that happen? More likely they'll send a limo for you to make sure you overdo it again, sap.

Here's how dumb hockey has been: Nine months before they declared bankruptcy, the Penguins signed Jaromir Jagr to a contract they couldn't afford. They did so with the full knowledge that Jagr was a magnificent talent with a spotty temperament. He was the kind of player who defied coaches, who would openly berate teammates and who would leave the ice to pout before the end of a period if things weren't going his way. You bought Jagr and you got ability and angst in equal proportion.

Desperate to get some financial relief, the Penguins traded Jagr to the Washington Capitals for a bundle of dubious second-tier prospects. It didn't matter what they got because the mission was to unload Jagr's contract. The Capitals got him and discovered he was the same gifted but brooding talent he'd been in Pittsburgh. So they extended his contract for even more money.

Then the Capitals came to understand that Jagr really wasn't any kind of leader and they could miss the playoffs with his contract dragging down the payroll.So they unloaded him on the New York Rangers, who serve as a salvage yard for everyone's expensive mistakes.

And that's why the NHL needs a salary cap: Because franchise owners aren't smart enough to avoid duplicating obvious mistakes.

Yes, those players just make too much money.

But what about the fools who give it to them?

John Mehno has covered Pittsburgh sports since 1974 and is the author of 'The Chronicle of Baseball' (Carlton, 2000) and 'The Best Book of Football Facts and Stats' (Firefly, updated for 2004).

In other matters..

The Steelers played only one night game this season but they'll be all over the prime time schedule next year. Part of that obviously has to do with this year's success but TV loves compelling storylines and strong visuals. Ben Roethlisberger takes care of the first and Bill Cowher's sideline histrionics fill the second requirement.

In advance of an important game against the Green Bay Packers, Minnesota Vikings head coach Mike Tice slept on the floor of his office. What, the Vikings don't have any sofas? Anyway, the Vikings lost so perhaps Tice needs to sleep in the parking lot before the Christmas Day game against the Packers.

Chuck Noll has four Super Bowl rings and didn't spend four nights sleeping in the office during his 23 seasons as Steelers coach. Funny how that worked out.

Walt Harris lost some bad ones and made some obvious mistakes in his stay at Pitt. That said, he still didn't deserve the unrelenting hammering he got in the local prints this season.

Wouldn't it be fun if Jackie Sherill replaced Joe Paterno?

(John Mehno can be reached online at: johnmehno@lycos.com)


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